When silence becomes unbearable, the world turns into a mime - people laugh, I can only see the ugly gesticulations; someone says something to me, it turns into mere gibberish - I still pretend, desperately try to make sense of the world the meaning of which is gradually being eroded everyday. I try to hide the shame, ignominy of not being able to bridge the gap, to bear my failure with dignity and forced nonchalance. But inside I burn, burn like hell --- consumed by helpless anger.